Last night I let Gandalf out of the office after supper because he had not marked or peed outside of the litter box at all the entire 4 days he was in there. Not 5 minutes after letting Gandalf out, Whitey sprayed the patio door right in front of me. Whitey is now in Confinement, too. I also popped a Prozac down his throat. Thankfully, it went right down.
Gandalf and Whitey were both put into my office and I cleaned it all up. Remember when Whitey LOVED Gandalf and would.not.stop.grooming him? Well, much to my utter shock Whitey started doing that screaming, hissing, threatening thing at Gandalf. It's not the first time, but it still shocked me.
And then?... Not 10 minutes later, Gandalf was using Whitey's back for a pillow while they both sawed logs. It truly boggles my mind.
Honestly, all this is walking on my last nerve. Now I can't be sure it was Gandalf doing all the marking. One great thing about blogging is you've blogged it and you can go back and look up stuff. I know the marking started not long after I brought Whitey home, which was August 9th, 2009. I had recently stopped letting Gandalf and Grayson out around July 2nd, 2009 after my parents flew up north - which was right after Gandalf was diagnosed with FLUTD, June 29th, 2009. Talk about the perfect storm?! I had always thought the marking was Gandalf's crystals until I also saw him mark a chair. Vertical spraying, not the squatting he would do when the crystals had him blocked up and he was straining to empty his bladder.
Someone has offered several times to take Whitey. She specializes in cats with behavioral issues and/or special needs. She works with her local shelter. She is a semi-regular commenter who adores him. I have heart-wrenching feelings about saying goodbye to Whitey - immediately followed by I really just don't see how I can continue living this way. Of course, the few times she and I corresponded, I was not aware that Whitey might mark, so she may or may not be interested anymore.
Sorry for venting so much, but I'm so stressed out about this. I know many of you have been through something similar. All I know is that I need to get my life back to normal. Please do not misunderstand... I do not for one single second regret rescuing Whitey... he's an absolute LOVE... but I do wish I had only my 2 Gray Boys again. It was absolutely perfect. I sorely miss that. I also know that Grayson misses Gandalf and the relationship they had together before Whitey.
::sigh::
And now, back to our regular scheduled post...
Finally Friday with Whitey
the "Formerly Not Exactly Feral But Outside", but now I’m Inside, Smilin’ Edition!
Yesterday Daisy’s post told us all about a Smile Contest which Mom initially did not think we would enter. Then something awesome happened…
Then Mom decided to try an animated photo, too!
I am a very good boy. I am using my litter box. I am purring and talking. My eye already looks better - no more goopies - and the swelling has already gone down quite a bit. Did you notice that I have blue eyes? I cannot see very well with my blue eyes, but they sure are pretty, aren't they? Although some white cats with blue eyes are deaf, I am not. If I hear a sudden noise, I jump and turn around to see. Of course, I am also not completely white!
I follow Mom and sit on her desk and purr at her while she works. Mostly, I am working very hard to get better. Mom is very surprised that I haven’t shown the slightest interest in going Outside. Been there, done that, Mom! I have a home and people to take care of me now!
So, I do not mind if my photo does not win the contest, because I know I am already a winner! Thank you to everybuddy for purring and praying for me! It’s working real good!
I understand your pain. My parents have four cats and one is currently peeing all over the house to mark her territory. My mom has tried everything and is at a lose with what to do....
ReplyDeleteI love Whitey and want what's best for all of you.
ReplyDeleteKnow that we are purring hard.
I feel for you and hope you can come to the best decision for you, purring like crazy over here. (but btw I know you may have done this already but I just thought I would throw it out there, have you tried having multiple things like cat trees so the cats can climb and be above each other to show the "dominance" and this is my propertyness through height? That may help because then each cat will feel like they have their own space.)
ReplyDeleteI sympathize. I have had those moments where there seemed to be no solution and I was at the end of my rope with whatever animals I had in the house at the time. Hope it helped to post about it. Sometimes we figure out what to do just by talking "to ourselves" via others. I know you will do the right thing -- whatever it is -- for you and for the cats. Hang in there!
ReplyDeleteWhat a cute smiling photo.
Jan
Chey is letting me take over her comments--I feel for you. Having had a cat that I adored who kept marking and it was a lot because of Georgia it is hard to know what to do. They are both your babies and how can you choose one over the other. It will work out alright at some point and you'll find the right thing to do.
ReplyDeleteThere is no doubt about it, the more cats there are, the more complicated it gets and the more the relationship we have with each one changes. You've done an amazing job with all the boys and now with Gracie, but it may be that the new reality is just going to have to be different from what you had with teh two boys initially. Hang in there.
ReplyDeleteThe Mom speaks:
ReplyDeleteI understand how you feel. It is worrying and upsetting when your cats start behaving differently.
However, they have all just moved again. So they are probably feling unsettled, and there are different smells etc. So they may feel cinfused or a need to mark their new home as theirs.
The snuggling photo does suggest there is no real hostility problem going on.
I'd give it a bit more time. Although I once had to allow a friend to give a new forever home to one of my beloved cats when my other cat just wouldn't accept him. So I feel your pain.
Jan (Milo and Alfie's mom)
You have a real problem and I sympathize mightily. I also think that the move may have something to do with it and maybe Grayson and Whitey just need a bit more time to adjust. I am sure that you will find the right solution eventually.
ReplyDeleteHopefully it is just settling in issues. Sorry it has turned out so stressful, we are purring for some calmness for you all!
ReplyDeleteFui and Suey let me take over.
ReplyDeleteI'm really sorry that you are having marking problems. One thing you must remember is that if you decide it is best for your kitty family to re-home Whitey, you are not letting him down. You have made miracles happen for that little cat, and being in a home where he is healthy, safe and happy is a victory in every sense of the word.
Can Whitey and Gandalf perhaps be confined together for a while in your office? If they are triggering each other, it might help them to learn not to spray if they are together. Teri at Furrydance is a genius when it comes to spraying. She may have some good advice.
I'm afraid I can't offer any advice but I do feel the move has a lot to do with it. Whitey lived there before and may think that it is his territory. Gandalf may be trying to lay his claim as he was with you before Whitey came along. There is obviously no real hatred between them as they will sleep together. Whitey may think that the office is Gandalf's space now and when he came out, he was entering his territory. It is still soon after the move so if you can bear with them for a while longer, hopefully things will settle down. Whatever you decide on, I know it will be in their best interest, but don't rush into your decision. Remember when Whitey went to live with your friend (sorry, I can't remember his name)you missed him so much that you brought him back home with you.
ReplyDeleteNo additional words of wisdom to add beyond what's been said -- even though there may have been spraying before this recent move to the Swamp, that seems to be what's bothering you the most right now and the move probably brought out the stress, along with the addition of Gracie to the mix (because she's been at the Swamp all along, yes? so they're really all just spending a lot of time with her now?). The idea raised of the Swamp having been Whitey's territory before and now everyone else being added is a good one too.
ReplyDeleteTake your time before deciding, but as was said, if you feel it's what's best for Whitey to give him to another loving home, then do what you have to do and don't stress yourself more over it.
Hugs,
The Mommy
Barb, we have been through this, so we know how it hurts. A peaceful family dynamic is worth platinum. You have our purrayers.
ReplyDeleteoh now i'll bet those flat cats will start this. i tried to keep them from reading it but you know them, they were right over my shoulder. i heard flat jeter say something about a new way to get attention. rats.
ReplyDeleteseriously honey, i know nothing about this but wish you all the best. i know you love them all.
hugs, bee
xoxoxoxoxoxo
Mom Barb here. Thanks everyone. Well, today IS another day and we all seem to all be feeling quite a bit better today.
ReplyDeleteWhitey and Gandalf are staying in my office together, so they will be getting lots more Mom time, too. I was delighted to find that Whitey is very easy to pill and just took his 2nd Prozac, followed by his Temptations.
Whitey loves him some Temptations. Srsly.
OH. we haz a sad for you mom Barb.
ReplyDeletebut srsly, we would take whitey in a heartbeat! i would be sad to see him go to someone else! Wilfred could teach him to be a good indoor cat that doesn't mark...
just something to think about.
im not kidding at all! we want him!
Hi, if you go into the hooman's bafroom, and use the tall white thing that looks like a bucket, it's like a litter box, only it has water in it. There's even paper for when you're done. Be careful not to fall in.
ReplyDeleteWe are just purring for all to calm down now that you are moved, and everyone has met Gracie. If it does come down to having to rehome Whitey, we hope he will be able to keep blogging....we would miss him terribly if he didn't.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry for all the stress you all are going through. I wish I had some good advice for you but I really don't - just support. Hopefully if they start to get used to the move they will start to relax and it will stop. We hope you have a good weekend - hopefully a cat-pee-free one!
ReplyDeleteAll we have to offer is purrs, and lots of them.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the update! The purrs are continuing for my favorite boys in the whole world (ok, don't let Nigel and Madison hear that!).
ReplyDeleteBarb, as you know, I am going through something similar with Wally, Ernie & Zoey...and I have been for almost 2 years now. I don't have the spraying issue (thank goodness) but not having them get along and having to keep them separated from one another is so frustrating...and wearing...I know how you feel...if I could find someone to take Zoey, I think I would have to let her go...it would break my heart, but it would be what's best for her...and the others....
ReplyDeleteGive it some time between them...and if you ever want to vent, I'm a willing ear....
Island Cats' mom
We got brother & sister Bengals, added are Savannah when they were almost 2. It took a year before we could leave all 3 alone together for the day. Then my daughter visits with her Aby and the spraying starts. Now we have our rescue kitty and she likes to poo on the carpet. The other 3 are nervous around her. Its always something with multiple cats.
ReplyDeleteAlmost anyone who has had a cat has had to deal with "inappropriate elimination" issues or spraying. Having bred Cornish Rex for the past 22 years and having taken back around 6 cats for peeing outside the box issues, having used various kinds of anxiety meds and various multiple litterbox choices, I have a lot of experience and wouldn't mind chatting on the phone with you about your problems if you think that might help (and it would save my fingers from having to type, lol)
ReplyDelete